Missing Becka

I haven't blogged for ages so decided it's time. I have a huge endocrine test tomorrow followed by a neuro test on Wednesday. There aren't enough hours in the day to be prepared for them both. And then part of me just doesn't care, because there is somewhere else I want to be. I want to be home with my family and with my Poppa, I want to do something. I want to feel at peace with what's happened and some kind of closure, but instead I just feel a big, open, unresolved sadness that I can't overcome. My visit home in May will help I'm sure. It's hard when people who weren't close to their grandparents don't understand how hard it is for those of us who are. I told one of my friends and they said "oh, I"m sorry" and then moved on and that was that, like it was no big deal. I didn't tell anybody at school, which I don't know if it makes it harder or easier, trying to pretend like everything is fine. Then I don't feel like I should be so upset: I'm fortunate to have been so close to her, she was suffering and ready to go, it's selfish of me to be trying to hold on so tight. I just wish I could have seen her one more time and said goodbye, but I need to stop dwelling on that wish, because I can't change it. I just need to go home and say an official goodbye, and let it all out.
In other news....well, there's not much. I think we have about 6 weeks left of school, then Matthew and I are off to L.A. for Christopher's graduation, then we or I will head out to Spokane for a few days, then I will be a second year PT student! Annabelle should be here any day now, so that will brighten the world a little bit :)

Clinical

I just finished my first week in the clinic and I am exhausted! There was more variety than I had expected. The first day my Clinical Instructor was still on vacation so I worked with another therapist and 75% of the patients were at approximately 6 weeks post-op rotator cuff repair so that was boring and I was a little pessimistic. Once my CI returned on Tuesday I started seeing a lot more variety and it was really interesting. She is great and still remembers what it is like to be a student. I feel like I understand everything that is going on, even if I wouldn't have known to do it since I have learned it yet. Things are beginning to come together and I'm really excited to start doing more hands-on stuff in the coming weeks.

Tomorrow I have to get up early and do some screenings at a rec center through the clinic I am at, but then I can hopefully RELAX! I didn't sleep well the whole time we were in Washington, and since we didn't have a day home before going into it I am incredibly exhausted. So far I have been doing a bit of studying to review things as they come up in the clinic and that has been really helpful because I have definitely forgotten some details! It's surprising to me how much nerve pathways have come into play so far in outpatient ortho, it is pretty exciting. This clinic is apparently more diverse than is typic, so that is wonderful because a typical environment would most likely bore me.

We only got to spend a couple days with Mandi and Mike which was sad, it was really hard to leave. I got to spend some quality time with Lysha making jingle balls and that was nice :) The family all seemed to be doing well, but for some reason the trip still exhausted me! It is good to be home and see Seagram. He was really happy to see us and has been really cuddly all week :)

There should be something more entertaining to share since I haven't blogged in so long, but....there is not :) Maybe on day I will learn not to ramble when I blog.... ;)

Done!

One more semester down. 11 finals, phew! I am exhausted, and excited for an actual break from school :) So many things on the to do list, but for today I am going to sit on the couch, then have a wonderful dinner made by my hubby tonight :) A bunch of people are going out tonight and I don't know how, I am so exhausted I just want to lounge! I can't wait to get the house in order and spend some free time with Matthew, then go home for the holidays and have enough time to visit with everyone. :)

OK, back to being a lazy bum, and probably fall asleep on the couch in about 5 minutes....

Addictive

Where else do you get beautiful snow (with clear roads), then a few days later it is back to sunshiny brightness so warm you can wear a t-shirt outside? I love Denver :)

Happy Happy Life :)

Last week was insane but I turned in several papers and a take-home test and am relieved to be done! I can't believe there are only 3 weeks left of the semester, it is INSANE! I am going a little coocoo (?) because I am SO excited to go home for Thanksgiving! I need to finish 2 papers before I leave, then all I'll need to do that weekend is study for comps, which I need a body for anyway so I can study AND spend time with family--perfect!

We went to a huge really cool bar by the Pepsi center last night with some friends to watch Cat/Griz....it was depressing, and the Huskies lost the Apple Cup...more depressing. I should start rooting for a better team. At least USC usually wins!

It is so exciting how much I am going to see family the next few months with all the weddings! It will be insane but definitely worth it :) We did an exercise in class the other day (moving on now ;) ) where we were given patient cases and told to try to deduce the source of the problem based on results of the exam. At first I though "yeah right, we're not ready for this" but after reading through the case it was completely obvious to me what the problem was and how to (generally, not specifically) fix it! I was really excited. It's crazy how much I've learned in only 6 months! it will be incredible to go to clinic and start applying it all, I can't wait! I am so excited to be a physical therapist, I get giddy sometimes :)

Only 3.5 days until the Bombino Thanksgiving!!!!!

Migraine's, holidays and music, oh my!

Hello Family! I don't have class until 10 day (a big scary presentation) but I had a work meeting at 7 and I'm to the point I don't want to look at my presentation for awhile so here I am to blog! haha

So, what is new? I went to the neurologist who said that my terrible headaches I've had for years are actually atypical migraines, and I learned that migraine "attacks" or whatever you want to call them can actually present in ways other than a headache so it might also be the cause of my stomach aches! I was so excited I was jumping of the walls that it might all get better :) He gave me a daily drug that he says ideally will reduce my symptoms 75%. I've only had 2 really bad headaches since I started it a months ago, but it's supposed to take a few weeks to kick in so that might even go down. Also I've been really stressed the past week when I got both of them so that might be part of it. So, I am really happy that one little pill a day could make life happier and less painful :)

I can't believe how much the semester is speeding up, I have a bunch of work the next two weeks, then one short week for Thanksgiving, then we come back and I have basically two weeks of finals. One week of comps and one week of written finals, with a couple classes in the first week. There is so much going on the week after Thanksgiving I don't think I will be able to relax much, but that is OK. We will be home for quite awhile of Christmas and that will be wonderful :) For the first time in YEARS most of the family will be together for "Thanksgiving". Mandi has to go back to work Thursday and we are going to Matthew's parents on the day, so we are having Thanksgiving on Wednesday with Lasagna, yummm.... :) It will be so wonderful to have the holiday with my Mike and Mandi :) Plus, since it's not the holiday yet the kids will be there! :) I'm not sure what their holiday schedule is this year so I suppose they might be there anyway.

Lets see....what else can I ramble on about for 10 minutes....I think that's about all the news actually. I have an exciting race schedule planned out for the next year but that is probably only interesting to me, and maybe Hershal :)

So long, my dear family. I will see most of you very soon :)

P.S. If anyone wants to fly to Denver Matthew and I are playing in a concert on November 19th :) haha, but really....it probably wouldn't be worth it ;)

Uneventful

School is going well but I am so excited for Winter break! It seems so far away...Matthew fixed my bike yesterday and we went for an hour long bike ride to make sure it was working OK before I rode it to school today. I woke up and was all ready and excited for a nice long, quiet bike ride early in the morning, OH MY GOSH, my butt hurt SO bad! So hopefully it will adapt soon because I really want to start biking on a regular basis. I want to work on my biking and swimming over the winter so I can do a triathlon this summer :) I found some triathlon virgins who said they'd take the plunge with me, so it should be pretty fun :) I'm thinking of starting the season with a May marathon though. We'll see :)

I am so excited to be a real life PT I can hardly wait sometimes. It is so excited how much I've already learned. I can't wait for clinical in January to start applying it and learning more. It's so funny talking to Mandi and hearing all of the issues that go on between people there, so many interpersonal issues transcend occupation.

So...not too much exciting going on in life here, just bored at the moment...really should go study. I was hoping to get my next Netflix movie today (Mandi got me 6 months free for my birthday!) but my e-mail said it will come tomorrow. Maybe it will surprise me :)

Sorry my life is so boring ;)